


Memories From You and From Me

by HappyJuicyfruit



Series: If These Ears Could Talk [5]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Celebration of Life, Derek Hale Feels, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski, Fluff, Grief/Mourning, Hale Family Feels, M/M, Pack Family, Panic Attacks, Spanish Translation, Stiles Stilinski Takes Care Of Derek Hale, hard of hearing Stiles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-02
Updated: 2018-05-02
Packaged: 2019-05-01 03:11:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,070
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14511294
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HappyJuicyfruit/pseuds/HappyJuicyfruit
Summary: On the anniversary of his family's death, Derek tries to distance himself from the pack.  Stiles doesn't let him.





	Memories From You and From Me

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Español available: [Memories From You and From Me (Traducción)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/15275949) by [Igni1LB](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Igni1LB/pseuds/Igni1LB)



> Part 5 in an ongoing series. I guess it could be stand alone, but at this point you should probably read the rest. 
> 
> This one is pretty sad, guys. Read the tags in warning! Derek has a panic attack, and is very sad.  
> It's also pretty fluffy though.
> 
>  
> 
> Now translated into Spanish by Igni1LB! Spanish version can be found here: https://www.wattpad.com/story/147166269-memories-from-you-and-from-me-traducci%C3%B3n

Derek lay in bed, staring up at the ceiling. He felt numb.

 

He knew the pack would be fine for one day alone, he had checked in with them all yesterday to make sure. He didn’t want anyone talking to him today. Because it was a Wednesday, Erica, Isaac and Boyd were all busy doing their own thing. Stiles was, thankfully, working on his last month of 7 classes, and he wasn’t due until Saturday morning. He would be too busy to notice if Derek went off the grid for one day. He had the day all to himself. 

 

The worst day of his life. 

 

He turned on his side, bringing his knees up to curl into a ball. He clenched his eyes shut, flighting off he tears. He knew if they started, he wouldn’t be able to stop them. Not today. 

 

Not even Laura had been able to stop the tears on this day. 

 

Derek didn’t know how long he lay like that before a persistent banging sound broke through. He raised his head, frowning at the doorway.  It sounded like… pans? 

 

Had someone broken into his house to steal pans? Today of all days? 

 

Derek sighed, deciding the thief could take the damn pans, but shot out of bed when there was a loud crash and a yelp. 

 

Derek knew that yelp. 

 

Derek made his way into the kitchen, and sure enough, there was Stiles. Sitting on the floor and clutching his foot, pots and pans scattered around him. 

 

Derek sighed. “Stiles,” he called out, waving an arm to grab the man’s attention 

 

Stiles head jerked up, his eyes wide, “shit! Sorry! I didn’t mean to wake you.” 

 

Derek glanced around the kitchen, noting the pile of ingredients on the counter. 

 

“I was making you pancakes, but I couldn’t find a frying pan. You have a lot of pots for someone who barely cooks.” Stiles rambled, shoving the pots back into the cupboard. “You go on back to bed, I’ll bring them up as soon as they’re finished!” 

 

Stiles sprang up after all the pots were put away, clutching a frying pan to his chest. Then he limped his way over to the stove top. 

 

Limped. 

 

Because of course Stiles would injure himself making pancakes. 

 

Derek sighed again. All he had wanted was to be left alone. He walked over, grabbing the pan and ignoring Stiles protests. 

 

“Come on, let me see your foot.” 

 

\-- 

 

10 minutes and a lot of whining later, Stiles sat on a stool in front of the stove, his foot propped up on a chair beside him. Ice covered the quickly forming bruise that was growing from his toes all the way to his ankle.  He had a spatula and a grin though, so Derek decided he was fine. 

 

Stiles was rambling on about his classes happily, flipping the pancakes and depositing them on the plate beside him.  Derek listened as he cut up the fruit Stiles had brought with him. 

 

When all the pancakes were finished, Stiles hopped around grabbing plates and forks until Derek shoved him into a chair and did it himself. The man was going to break his own neck one day. 

 

“There’s whipped cream and syrup in the fridge too! And chocolate sauce. I know Cora and Mickey liked it, but you never said if you liked it too. I got it just in case.” 

 

Derek froze halfway to the fridge, Stiles words hitting him like a ton of bricks. Cora and Mickey? His eyes flickered between the pancakes and the fruit and Stiles smiling face. 

 

Did Stiles know- ? Was Stiles- ? How-? 

 

“What?” Derek said. Everything pounding in his head. 

 

“This is what you guys would do during celebrations, right? Pancake breakfast?” Stiles fidgeted, his eyes wary, “and then a hike around the preserve? I don’t know if I’ll be able to do that part now, cause I banged my foot up, but we could go chill out there? Bring some cards and our books?” 

 

Derek felt something in his chest tighten. That was what they used to do.. It had been so long ago, Derek wasn’t sure if he could do it again. 

 

He didn’t think he would ever have the option to do it again. 

 

“This isn’t really a day to celebrate,” he managed to grit out. His mouth tasted like ash. 

 

Stiles eyes were steady. “It is. It’s a celebration of life.” 

 

Derek tried to inhaled a shaky breath, but he couldn’t. He had never thought of it that way. This day was about guilt. Derek’s selfishness. Anger, and pain, and tears, and blood and.. And even Laura would lash out at him on this day. And he deserved it. He deserved it all, and much, much, more. 

 

He wasn’t sure what happened after that. The next thing Derek knew, Stiles was crouched in front of him. Stiles hand was on his chest, and his other hand was holding Derek’s against his own. He was breathing slow, deep, breaths. 

 

“Derek? You with me?” 

 

Derek nodded, the movement felt jerky and he shut his eyes as dizziness overcame him.  Stiles hand came up to cup his neck. 

 

“Alright, take it easy big guy. You just had one hell of a panic attack.” 

 

Panic attack? No, that was a Stiles thing. Derek didn’t have panic attacks. He tried to open his mouth to say as such, but found he couldn’t even open his mouth. 

 

He whined, trying to work his mouth open. Stile shushed him. 

 

“It’s almost past, baby. You’ll be okay soon.” 

 

Stiles stroked Derek hair. Derek leaned into it, allowing himself to float in Stiles comforting smell. He shut his eyes once more, focusing on the feeling of Stiles fingers gently carding through his hair. 

 

What could have been a few hours, but was probably only a few minutes later, Derek felt Stiles pull away. He tilted forward, wanting to follow Stiles warm touch. Almost immediately, Derek felt Stiles warm hands on his arms, attempting to pull him up.  Derek went willingly. Stiles always had the best ideas. 

 

Stiles slowly led him through the loft, gently pulling Derek along like a small child. In Derek’s bedroom, Stiles pushed him until he was sitting on the edge of the bed. He disappeared for a moment, and when he returned it was with a warm cloth. He gently wiped at Derek’s face, wiping away tears hadn’t even known he had shed. 

 

Derek felt something sink in his stomach. He knew that now that they had started, the tears wouldn’t stop. 

 

Stiles didn’t seem to mind though. He gently pushed Derek back, wrapping him up in the duvet and kissing his head.  

 

“Rest for a bit. I’ll keep the pancakes warm in the oven.” 

 

Derek didn’t bother trying to speak. He shut his eyes and let darkness take him. 

 

\-- 

 

The next time Derek woke up he felt much better. His face felt sticky from tears, but they were no longer running down his face. Derek couldn’t remember a time when the tears stopped so easily for anything.. For anyone. 

 

But Stiles wasn’t just anyone. 

 

He moved to get up, but stopped when he felt an extra arm move with him.  He turned to see Stiles sprawled out beside him, one arm splayed over Derek’s stomach.  

 

Derek smiled at the sight.  

 

Stiles must not have been in a deep sleep, because he was moving as soon as Derek touched his arm. 

 

“You okay?” He slurred, brushing away drool with the back of a hand. 

 

“I’m okay.” Derek said. He was surprised to find he meant it. 

 

“Okay. Cause it’s okay if you’re not okay, okay?” Stiles said, then frowned and thought over what he had said. “I mean, it’s fine if you’re not… fine.” 

 

“It’s okay, Stiles. I’m okay, really.” 

 

“Okay.” Stiles said, inching closer to Derek. “I’m sorry. I wanted it to be a surprise, but that was stupid. I shouldn’t have tried to spring this on you like that.” 

 

Derek shook his head, “I didn’t even know you knew what day this was.”

 

Stiles frowned again. “Who do you think keeps everyone away every year? And makes sure you have easy access to food?” 

 

That brought Derek to a pause. “What?”

 

Stiles rolled his eyes, “last year I brought you pizzas, dude, remember?” 

 

Derek thought back. There had been pizzas left on the counter, but they had been cold. Derek had assumed someone had forgotten them the night before. That made no sense now that he thought about it, but at the time he hadn’t been thinking. 

 

“That was you? You barely liked me then.” 

 

“I’ve always liked you, you jerk, you just didn’t know how to read my vibes yet.” Stiles curled around Derek’s side, pushing his face into Derek’s chest. Derek knew Stiles wouldn’t be able to hear him now, with his good ear against the mattress. This is why Stiles usually got this side of the bed… Derek smiled at the thought, wondering if Stiles had put him here in the off chance his own smell would calm Derek down. 

 

He curled an arm around Stiles, humming in contentment. 

 

\-- 

 

Stiles gave a toast to the Hale pack before they started eating. Derek didn’t know what else to add, so he clicked his glass against Stiles and left it at that. This year, at least, was enough they were celebrating their lives at all. Maybe he would say something next year. 

 

The pancakes were a bit overcooked now, but they tasted delicious to Derek.  Derek liked to keep things simple, with fruit and a bit of cream. He smiled as Stiles poured anything and everything over his pancakes, shoving it all into his mouth and looking like a happy squirrel. 

 

They drove down to the preserve after.  They had missed the majority of the day, but Stiles insisted that they could still catch the sunset at the cliff.  Derek pulled up close to the tree line in Stiles old Jeep, only stopping when they could see the sun shining over the town. 

 

Stiles was right. This was beautiful. 

 

They sat and watched for a few minutes in silence, before Stiles pulled out his phone and began to fidget with it.  

 

Derek let him fidget for a few moments, until it became apparent that Stiles was trying to work his way up to something and was clearly not getting there by himself. He reached over and touched Stiles arm, smiling when the man turned to face him. He raised an eyebrow in question. 

 

Stiles huffed out a laugh. “I, uh, did something. In honor of their celebration day. I don’t know if you want to see it..” 

 

Derek thought about that for a second, but then decided that Stiles had been right about everything else today. Why not? 

 

“Show me.” 

 

Stiles nodded, pulling out his phone. He tapped away on it for a second, then passed it over to Derek.  Derek looked down at it in confusion. 

 

Then he froze. 

 

_ When I had my first seizure, no one knew what was happening. No one knew how to react to an 8 year old girl suddenly falling to the floor.  _

_ But Mickey knew.  _

_ Mickey caught me before my head hit the floor. Now I look back and realize that he smelled something off before I even had the seizure. But at the time? Mickey was my hero. He was two years older than me, and he literally swept me off my feet. He was one of the reasons why I trusted you when you came to me at the hospital that night.  _

_ I never forgot Mickey, and the great thing he did for me.  _

_ I never will.  _

_ Love you Alpha Hale,  _

_ Erica _

 

“Stiles, what - ?” 

 

“I know you don’t have that many momento’s from you family so… we all put our brains together for any memory we have of the Hales. We were all mostly kids at the time, but my dad and Melissa threw in a few stories too. I wanted- we wanted you to have something to remember that was good. Something to show you that you weren’t the only one who remembers them.” 

 

Derek clutched the phone in his hand. He flipped his finger across the screen, eyes widening when he saw how many stories were on here. 

 

“And I.. can I have these?” He looked over at Stiles. Stiles was beaming at him. 

 

“Yeah, babe, I’ll print it off for you. Lydia and Allison found a few pictures too, when they were looking through and seeing if they could find any happy news stories on you guys.” 

 

Derek nodded, unable to form words right now he turned back to the phone in his hand. 

 

_ All Hales did home births. It was something well known among the nurses at the hospital, mostly because it was seen as pretty scandalous at the time. There was one Hale though, who came screaming into the emergency room nine months pregnant with her water already broken.   _

_ And let me tell you, she did not come alone.  _

_ Hales of all shapes and sizes showed up that day. Your mom lead them all to the waiting room as calm as can be, as your aunt and uncle went in to a private room. I remember seeing you there, only nine years old, pulling your little sisters pigtails. She didn’t cry though, she turned around and socked you right in the eye.  _

_ It was hilarious.  _

_ We all kept trying to offer you things, but your mom kept repeating we shouldn’t worry. You were all waiting for your new family member. When your uncle finally came out to announce that it was a little girl? I had never seen a happier crowd.  _

_ That’s how I remember them. A happy family.  _

_ You honor their memory well, Derek. You’ve made your own happy family now.  _

_ They would be proud. I know I am.  _

_ Love, Melissa.  _

  
  


Derek sniffed, holding back the tears that threatened to start again. He turned to Stiles with a watery smile. 

 

“This is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me. Thank you.” 

 

Stiles moved forward and grabbed him, squeezing him in a tight hug. “You deserve all the nice things, big guy.” 

 

Derek snorted, burying his nose in Stiles neck. “I love you,” he whispered there, hoping Stiles heard him. 

 

“I love you too, so much.” 

 

\-- 

 

That night, Stiles had to drive back to campus. You didn’t take 7 classes and still get the luxury of missing class. Derek didn’t mind, the idiot had already missed one day of school. He was happy Stiles had come at all. 

 

They kissed softly before Stiles clamored back into his Jeep for the long drive. Derek made sure his injured foot was safely propped out of the way, and made Stiles promise to stop somewhere if it started hurting. Derek would pay for the freaking motel room if it meant Stiles didn’t permanently damage his foot. 

 

Stiles rolled his eyes, but he agreed. 

 

Derek stood and watched him until his tail lights turned the corner. Then he went back inside, heading straight for his computer. Stiles had promised to get him a hard copy by the weekend, but he had set up all the files on Derek’s laptop before he left so he had it all before then. 

 

Derek ran a finger over one of the pictures on screen. It was a snapshot of his family the day Cora was born, attached to the announcement in the paper. The picture was grainy, but they were there. His parents, Laura, Mickey, baby Cora and Derek. They were all there. And they were all happy. 

 

He scrolled back up, re-reading the first two stories, and then starting the third. 

 

_ When my mom was in the hospital, I hated going to school. I wanted to see her everyday, cause we didn’t know when it would be the end, you know? So I didn’t get wasting my time in school when I could be spending it all with her.  _

_ So, naturally, I decided to ditch school and go on my own.  _

_ There I was, all of seven years old, making my way across town by myself. I was terrified that my dad would find me and send me home, or worse, send me back to school.  _

_ But my dad didn’t find me. Yours did.  _

_ He was walking out of a shop and then he just stopped in his tracks and turned to look right at me. It was pretty creepy, considering I was on the other side of the street and two blocks down. I saw him do it though, and knew he had spotted me. His eyes looked all over, but it was pretty obvious that I was out there alone. I tried to make a break for it.  _

_ Needless to say, he caught up with me pretty fast.  _

_ He didn’t take me back to the school though. No, your dad was the fucking best. He actually sat down right there, in the middle of the sidewalk, and  _ listened _ to me! Then he gave me a giant hug and took me right to the hospital. We could only stay for a little while, but it was the best day ever. Even my mom agreed.  _

_ When he dropped me off back at school, he made me promise I wouldn’t do that again. I promised, and I didn’t. I wanted to, but I didn’t. Cause I made him a promise.  _ _  
_ _ I didn’t realize it was your dad until Lydia and Allison sent me these pictures. For a while I thought I had made the whole thing up, actually, cause I never saw him around again.  _

_ But now that I know, I’m not even surprised. You have the same kind hearted spirit that he did.  _

_ I love you, Derek.  _

_ Happy Celebration of Life.  _

_ Stiles.  _

 

Derek smiled. It was surprisingly easy to picture his dad with Stiles as a kid. His dad was so patient, he would have been great with him. 

 

He closed the lid of the laptop, running a hand over the smooth surface. He would read a few more tomorrow, not all in one go. Savour them. 

 

That night when he went to bed, for the first time in seven years it wasn’t with tears. It wasn’t a day of mourning that began and ended with grief. 

 

It was a celebration of life. And it started with pancakes.  


 

\-- 

**Author's Note:**

> Next one is going to have more humor! I promise! 
> 
> Thanks for reading! :) Hope you liked it. Leave kudos and comments to let me know what you think!


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